#447. Jonathan Van Ness on Shame, Shopping, Bodies, and Hope

How do you find hope in a lifetime that has experienced more trauma than most? 

Guest Jonathan Van Ness says that the key is to stay curious and focus on happiness and joy, even if it’s just in a tiny corner.

Jonathan Van Ness is a hairstylist by trade and best known as one of the hosts of the Netflix series Queer Eye. He is also the author of Love That Story and the New York Times bestselling memoir Over the Top, and the host of the podcast Getting Curious with Jonathan Van Ness. 

In this episode we talk about: 

• The universality of processing grief
• What a “window of tolerance” means 
• Getting curious about shame
• Body dysmorphia
• JVN’s complex and contradictory feelings about shopping
• What “parts therapy” or Internal Family Systems therapy is
• Setting boundaries
• Connecting and cultivating joy 

Content Warning: Explicit language and mentions of sexual abuse, substance abuse, body dysmorphia, and references to sex.

Where to find Jonathan Van Ness online: 

Website: jonathanvanness.com

Social Media:

• https://twitter.com/jvn
• Facebook 
• https://www.instagram.com/jvn/
• YouTube

Book Mentioned:

• Love That Story: Observations From A Gorgeously Queer Life

Other Resources Mentioned:

• Over The Top: My Story
• Getting Curious with Jonathan Van Ness (Netflix)
• Queer Eye (Netflix)
• Gay of Thrones (Funny or Die)
• Getting Curious with Jonathan Van Ness (Podcast)
• Brené Brown
• Gabe Rosenberg
• Internal Family Systems (Parts Therapy)
• #323 How (and Why) to Hug Your Inner Dragons | Richard Schwartz (TPH episode) 
• #400. Jameela Jamil on Mental Self-Defense (TPH episode)
  

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install