#489. Can You Really Conquer Hatred Through Love? | Father Gregory Boyle

The idea of loving people no matter what— no matter how obnoxious or unacceptable their behavior is can sound simultaneously treacly and downright impossible.

But today's guest Father Gregory Boyle talks about the practicality of this idea by showing how the concept of loving no matter what can be used as a tool— not to condone bad behavior but to help see people as doing their best, no matter how unskillfully.

Father Gregory Boyle is a Jesuit priest who founded a remarkable organization called Homeboy Industries, which is the largest gang intervention, rehabilitation, and reentry program in the world. He has a new book out called, The Whole Language: The Power of Extravagant Tenderness.

In this episode we talk about:

• How Homeboy Industries began 34 years ago

• Boyle’s practices for working with stress
• What he means when he says you have to put death in its place
• Motivating people through joy rather than admonition
• How to catch yourself when you’re about to demonize or be judgmental
• How to set boundaries
• How to dole out consequences without closing the doors to anybody
• And we talk about Father Boyle’s quite expansive and inclusive notion of God

Content warnings: There are mentions of sensitive topics including, sexual trauma, violence, drug abuse and domestic abuse.

Where to find Father Gregory Boyle online:

Website: homeboyindustries.org

Social Media:

• Twitter
• Facebook

Books Mentioned:

• The Whole Language: The Power of Extravagant Tenderness
• Tattoos on the Heart: The Power of Boundless Compassion
• Barking to the Choir: The Power of Radical Kinship

Other Resources Mentioned:

• The Global Homeboy Network
• On Cultivating Courage: An Evening with Pema Chödrön and Father Greg Boyle
• God’s Pantry
• Matthew Dowd
• Pema Chödrön
• Joseph Goldstein
• Julian of Norwich
• St. Ignatius of Loyola

Additional Resources:

Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install